Monday, October 5, 2015 reporter Charles J. Dean quotes Mark Twain in effort to spark affair via Ashley Madison Web site

Charles J. Dean
A veteran reporter for Alabama's largest news-gathering organization quotes Mark Twain in an effort to attract a woman (other than his wife) on the Ashley Madison extramarital-affair Web site.

We reported on September 9 that Charles J. Dean was one of numerous prominent Alabamians whose names appear at Ashley Madison, which was hacked by a group that took offense at the site's efforts to encourage spouses to cheat on each other.

Dean joins Bradley Arant lawyer Rob Campbell, the son-in-law of former governor Bob Riley, as the two Alabama Ashley Madison users we have outed so far. But never fear, there are more big names where those two came from--many of them corporate, legal, and financial types. They will be exposed shortly, as will similar types in Missouri, where my wife and I now live--and where deputies unlawfully evicted us and left Carol with a shattered left arm and horribly bruised right arm.

As for Chuck Dean, he apparently was quite eager to cheat on his wife, and we now have a summary of his account activity at Ashley Madison. Those of a literary bent will be impressed that Dean borrowed words from one of America's best and most beloved writers to further his extramarital activities.

In fact, we have to admit that Dean's come-on lines are quite well written--better than anything we've seen from him at Here is Dean's description of himself and his desires, which comes under the clever caption of  "Hi, Baby":

I like a woman who knows that less is often more, whether in how she dresses or in the words she uses, or in the kisses she gives. And I like some indication that a brain is at work. What is between the ears is every bit as important, maybe more important, than what is between . . . well, you know. I try to take the advice Mark Twain offered: "Life is short. Break the rules. Forgive quickly. Kiss slowly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably and never regret anything that makes you smile." Some of these I have failed at, and some I have succeeded in. Life is a work in progress, if you are interested!"

Got to admit that I'm impressed with Dean's use of the language here. Most of it is stolen from Mark Twain, but if you are going to steal, you might as well steal from one of the greats. If I were a woman, Old Chuck might have me out my drawers in no time--at least until I saw his picture.

At least one Alabama journalist, Rob Holbert of Langiappe Mobile, has questioned the accuracy of the Ashley Madison information and taken me to task for reporting on the subject, especially in regards to Chuck Dean. Well, here is some information for Holbert to chew on; it's data straight from Chuck Dean's AM account: (The full summary can be viewed at the end of this post).

* Account number -- 27665102
* Last name/first name -- Dean, Charles J.
* Account creating date/time -- 08/07/2014 12:05 PM
* User name -- flyby25
* Account email --
* Sign-up IP address --
* Geographic location -- 33.4602, -86.8092
* Gender -- male
* City/state -- Birmingham, AL
* Initially seeking -- Whatever excites me
* Weight -- 195
* Height -- 6 foot
* Body type -- Fit
* Date of birth -- 07/17/1960
* Relationship status -- single male seeking female (This surely would be news to Dean's wife, Laurie O. Dean, who is listed as co-owner of their $284,000 house in Homewood; we can find no record in Alabama court files that they have divorced.)
* What turns me on -- Sense of Humor, Confidence, Discretion/Secrecy, Casual Jeans/T-shirt Type (Discretion/secrecy is a turn on? Sounds like Old Chuck is serious about this cheating thing.)
Payment history --

(a) Date: 01/23/2015
(b) Credit card: AMEX 1003
(c) Amount: $19.99
(d) Billing Address: 328 Lathrop Avenue, Birmingham AL 35209

Ashley Madison might be a slipshod operation--and it is a scam that anyone with three functioning brain cells should have seen from the outset--but, by God, the company knows how to keep detailed records on its paying customers.

Chuck Dean's full summary can be viewed below. And we have more such summaries coming on prominent professionals in multiple states--Alabama, Missouri, and perhaps others.

(Note: We have to give major props to our Legal Schnauzer Computer Forensics and Accuracy Research Team--we call them C-FART, for short. Seriously, we have some extremely talented tech-savvy individuals who are helping us gather data from the Ashley Madison info that hackers placed on the dark Web. These reports would not be possible without the helping hands of individuals who know their way around many corners of the digital world. We are deeply grateful for their expertise and support.)


Anonymous said...

This is priceless!

Anonymous said...

Chuck Dean has been a lapdog for Bentley on the Rebekah Caldwell Mason affair story. Now, maybe we know why.

Anonymous said...

Best story you will read on the Web today. Great reporting on an important topic--and it's funny as hell, too.

Anonymous said...

"If I were a woman, Old Chuck might have me out my drawers in no time--at least until I saw his picture."

Hah, great line, LS.

Steve said...

This story cannot be right. You describe Charles J. Dean as a reporter. From what I have read, he is a fiction writer! Not a reporter.

legalschnauzer said...

Good one, Steve. Thanks for pointing out that error on my part.

Anonymous said...

Wonder if he'll try to pull out some more Mark Twain quotes when his wife beats over the head with a frying pan?

Anonymous said...

Rob Hilbert is in denial. It ain't a river in Egypt.

Anonymous said...

Saved this post to the Internet archive with the first six comments the last being LS at 2:44 pm on October 5, 2015.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...

Well at least Dean wasn't trolling Ashley Madison for queer sex and an afternoon all male blow job. The Mullet Wrapper that took you task for exposing Dean should have scooped you as it is an Advertising Rag Tabloid. Keep it up Roger sex sells and Dean's story along with Governor Bentley's afternoon delights make compelling reads. Good luck and keep a close eye out for the law.