Thursday, October 27, 2011

"Ron Burgundy" Returns to Defend the Honor of Leura and Bill Canary

Ron Burgundy

We introduced you last week to a reader named "Ron Burgundy," who sent us comments under an obviously fictitious name in an effort to counter our report about marital troubles for Alabama GOP heavyweights Leura and Bill Canary. "Ron Burgundy" has made a return visit.

Also coming out of the woodwork again is a reader we have named "Mr. Dick Cheese," a Canary defender with a foul mouth, a disregard for punctuation, and an apparent inability to string together coherent sentences.

We offered up the original missives from "Ron" and "Dick" in an effort to help our readers understand how Republican thugs really think and communicate. In that spirit of public service, we provide the latest from a couple of guys who sound like characters from an X-rated graphic novel.

What's on "Ron Burgundy's" mind? Check it out:

Today I saw your article that you wrote on your responses to the Leura Canary articles. I found it humorous. I realize my last email may have seemed rather rash and hard on you, but since then I have rallied how truly insignificant you and your blog are. I would still like to know who your "multiple sources" are. If you were to write a paper and cite your text as "multiple sources" it would be invalid and so sir I would like legitimate sources. Yes, I am a Will Ferrell fan. Also, I would like to know why believe that the comment about "dick cheese" came front the BCA? That seems a little far fetched to me.

I have to admit that I kind of look forward to hearing from "Ron." He's an insulting cuss, but I have to give him high marks for coming up with a clever cover name, one that automatically interjects a touch of humor into the proceedings. Here's how I responded to our very own "anchorman":


If my blog and I are "insignificant," why are you writing me again? In fact, why did you write me the first time?

If my blog is insignificant, why are you afraid to reveal your true identify so we can have a legit discussion. If I reveal your identify, no one reads my blog anyway, right? It's insignificant, right?

I posted the IP address from which the comment came. My blog analytics show that very clearly, and they show it came from BCA. Analytics also show that someone (or several someones) from BCA are spending quite a bit of time reading my blog. Why are they reading my insignificant work?

I would suggest you take the IP address I posted and run a geolocation on it. You will find where it came from. Here is the IP address:

Why would you be concerned about that, though, considering that my blog is insignificant?

Why am I "being watched"--your words--if I'm insignificant?


As you can tell, I was not in a fun-loving mood when I wrote that reply. If I had it to do over again, I'd try to throw in something to tickle Ron's funny bone. Perhaps I could have noted that the movie version of Ron Burgundy had a dog named "Baxter," and Mrs. Schnauzer and I have a cat named "Baxter." In fact, our cat--who already had his name when we adopted him at age 1--probably received his name from Ron's dog.

As for Mr. Dick Cheese (MDC), I don't see anything amusing about him. He comes across as a truly disturbed individual. Here is part of his latest "charm offensive":

you clearly don't know how to use fucking facts. Name some sources, I guarantee my contrary evidence is more legitimate than anything you can pull out of your well laid ass.

If MDC had been to Sunday School since his previous missive, it apparently didn't take. Here is my reply:

If your evidence is so strong, please share it--along with your true identity.

Also, I would be glad to interview both Bill and Leura Canary on this and other matters. I assume you know them, so please feel free to relay this offer. Would be glad to interview you, too.

What do you say?

How did MDC respond? Apparently by changing his name to "Legal Rottweiler" and responding on a different post:

Legal Schnauzer is a run in the mill autistic human being. He has not produce a single citation/ form of evidence showing who his so called "informants" are, and that he has requested an email. I honestly feel sympathy for all of the followers of this blog who believe all of the BS he says. I, being close friends with the Canary's, can truthfully inform you that all of the information provided by Legal Schnauzer is false. I do agree with what Ron Burgandy previously said about him lying.

PS- If your gonna name your blog after a dog, don't name it after a "pussy of a dog"

MDC refers to me as an "autistic human being." He must have no idea what autism is or he enjoys making sport of people with disabilities. Either way, he clearly is a Republican. My response:

You appear to be a rottweiler with no teeth, afraid to reveal his real identity. I can hear you shivering all the way from your post in Montgomery.

I would be happy to interview you, Billy, Leura and anyone else you would care to bring along.

Let me know when you want to set it up.

Want more disturbing stuff from Mr. Rottweiler? Remember, this appears to be the same guy whose original post came from a computer at the Business Council of Alabama. Really makes you wonder about the kind of folks hanging around at the BCA offices:

If you would like to know my identity then i would like to report you as an internet predator, you sick fuck. Do you honestly think i would put my name and information on this blatantly shady and misinforming website? I think that this all reinforces my previous statements, you sir are in fact autistic.

This is the last item I am posting from Mr. Rottweiler. I think we have a strong enough sample size to see that this fellow is in danger of becoming unhinged--as if he were ever "hinged" in the first place.

As for "Ron Burgundy," I wouldn't mind hearing back from him. He clearly has a sense of humor, which indicates there is at least a hint of humanity there. That puts him ahead of many Republicans.


Redeye said...

"PS- If your gonna name your blog after a dog, don't name it after a "pussy of a dog"

How low can you go?

jeffrey spruill said...

Yea, I think MDC meets the criteria of intensive research by one aspiring to achieve a doctorate in psychoanalysis!!!

Jen said...

"Ron" is wrong. If you published a paper with the citation "multiple sources" it wouldn't be invalid. It would be unsubstantiated. Just because an argument isn't proven doesn't make it invalid. And just because an argument is valid doesn't make it proof.

Anonymous said...

"He must have no idea what autism is or he enjoys making sport of people with disabilities. Either way, he clearly is a Republican."

There's no reason that it can't be both, but I guarantee that it's the latter. All republicans are like that. Here's what a republican in Kansas said about a hospital for mentally handicapped people:

"In an Oct. 17 email addressed to "all," Michael Egan, a GOP precinct committeeman, asserted Patton's advocacy kept open a "hospital which does Johnson County taxpayers absolutely no good, but is a welfare program for state employees in Topeka."
He continued: "There is our boy, Joe Patton, leading the charge in the Kansas House of Representatives to keep this taxpayer draining piece of garbage hospital open."

That's what republicans think of services for those less fortunate--taxpayer draining pieces of garbage.

James Greek said...

Who does Mr. Dick Cheese-Legal Rotweiller think he is?! He is indeed a dick cheese. I for one am autistic and I am a regular guy. And I wouldn't vote for that freakin Republican in Kansas if he was dog catcher. He sure does enjoy making fun of people with disabilities. Gosh It makes me hate the canaries even more.

Anonymous said...

seems theres a possibilty, of internal, squabbles, amongst differing factions of bushies, perhaps to find out LS, sources, for numerous reasons, via-fake personas,signed, the phsycic.

Anonymous said...

Seems Rotty has lost his internet privileges. Must be grounded. When his parents reinstate his privileges, maybe he should research and learn the difference between writing a research paper and investigative journalism.

James Greek said...

Do the Cline Eastwood on him Roger! You know "Go ahead make my day?"